Working on achieving a goal can be a drag. At times it feels like an obligation when the effort to get what you want makes you question is this for me.

Suppose your goal is to lose 20 pounds. You start your diet and you diligently put in your time at the gym. Then there’s a birthday party in your family. A nice, big dinner. Ice cream and cake. Being true to your goal means taking it easy on the festivities – even passing up dessert all together. Resentment can begin to set in. Other people get to indulge. Why not you’

Or suppose you have decided to start an online business. You know there is money to be made there. But it’s hard work. You need to learn about marketing, setting up a website, getting traffic and so much more. It takes a lot of time to get your business up and running so you are still working at your day job to pay the bills. You spend two hours a night on your online business. And then, when you get into work, the whole office is talking about Game of Thrones. You don’t have time to watch TV. And it makes you crabby.

Or your goal is to pay off your credit cards and get completely out of debt. You have a budget that forces you to cut back on spending. And you’re making progress. But then your sister shows up with a pair gorgeous boots. You want them. You really want them. But it would break your budget to buy them. Why does your sister always get everything she wants’

Sometimes working toward your goal feels like denial instead of like a joy. The resentment you feel is momentary. It will come but it will go, too. Don’t let it stand in the way of your achievement.

The self-discipline you bring to achieving your goal is long-term. And the results are long-term, too. When the birthday party is over and the TV show has gone off the air, the changes that you are making will continue to add value to your life. Self-discipline brings long-term results that is your gift to yourself.

Anticipate moments that my test your commitment to your health, business and your wallet. Be prepared for them. Make a plan for how you will be able to have birthday at the event or if you decide not to have the cake be okay with it because you are secure in yourself and your goals. Knowing how you are going to handle those situations before you arrive is your best offense.

And if at some point your self-discipline fails you, and you give in to the temptation. Forgive yourself and get back to your plan. Don’t let that small failure derail yourself from working on your goal. It’s like Lance Armstrong says, “Pain is temporary. Quitting lasts forever.”

It may not always feel like it, when you are passing up treats and relaxation and nice belongings, but when it comes to achieving your goals and making your dreams come true, your self-discipline is a gift you give yourself.

Which one are you” Doer, thinker, a combo you think about it and don’t take action. Wanna change that’ There are many ways to become a person of action and what works for someone else may not work for you.

Action people are organized and know exactly how to proceed from one project to another seamlessly and without effort. They know how to get shit done!! While those of us who aren’t action takers feel like we flounder. We feel disorganized, haplessly moving one piece of paper to another location without knowing why. Action takers feed on taking action it’s what gives them energy, it’s what drives them.

Flounders at the end of the day are still floundering and can’t understand why little to nothing has been accomplished yet they are so exhausted!

To make the change from floundering to action taker is all about organization. Decide where you need to start do you need to make a to-do list and prioritize it. Do you need to put the most important ones at the top and each time you complete a goal or project scratch it off and feel the satisfaction. This works best for me. I LOVE checking the boxes as I’m on the way to my goal.

When everything on the list is finished, treat yourself. Even if you don’t quite complete the list in one day, go ahead and celebrate your victories. This gives you something to look forward to and gives you incentive to accomplish more. When Jerry Seinfeld first started out he challenged himself to write 1 joke per-day. He then bought a calendar and put it on his wall and every day he wrote a joke it make a big X. The goal was to not break the streak!

I love list making, but it’s possible for you to get into a rut of getting ready to get ready and not taking ACTION!! I struggle with focus and one of the best things I do is time block and do what I really want to accomplish, I do it first thing in the AM!!

Now if it’s a task that I really don’t want to do, I also have a You Tube highlight reel that I listen to get me in the zone. Based on the video I feel like a Tom Brady coming out of the tunnel on Superbowl Sunday.

This energy will go away, so do as much as you can before it leaves your body.

What I do know is that when I’m moving toward my goals I’m fired up and when I hit my goals cue Alicia Keyes, This Girl Is On Fire!

I use to struggle with not getting things done and playing the guilt and blame game. Then by making this simple shift to have at least 1 hour of productivity things started to shift for me in my health and my business.

Change the way your think and you will change the way you act.

If you want to have the courage to own your body and your life like a boss you could benefit from my Fabulously Thriving Frame Work.

Seriously who doesn’t want to feel good about themselves! When you are confident, you feel better emotionally and mentally. Life feels good

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and from your relationships to your business life feels damn good.

That’s why you should go about doing anything to boost your self-confidence. One of the best ways I know how to boost your confidence is exercising. Plus it has some amazing health benefits.

So how can exercise boost self-confidence’

Here Are 7 Ways How Exercising Boosts Your Confidence

1. Weight Control. Not feeling your leanest really can keep you from feeling your best. Exercising and healthy eating is one of the manage or lose your weight. It’s a simple equation the better shape you are, the better you will feel. When you feel good about yourself, it’s easier to make friends and more connections in life means more confidence.
2. Mood Booster. No one skips to their workout, but damn you feel glad that you did it. Working out is one of the best mood boosters I know, that’s legal. Now don’t worry if you don’t have time, you can always, go for a walk, bike ride or a run. Moving your body helps your brain to stimulate brain chemicals like dopamine and serotonin, these chemicals give you that feel good feeling.
3. More energy. In this day and age, who isn’t looking for more energy’ Making exercise a regular practice helps you to feel better. When you feel better you want do more.
4. Better sleep. It’s hard to feel confident when you are dragging ass!! Regular exercise helps you get to sleep and stay asleep. Too many studies prove that sleep is necessary for general feelings of well-being.
5. Improves productivity. One of the best ways to clear the mind is to exercise regularly. I get some of my best ideas working out. Working out helps me to work through different challenges I may be facing. Plus when you push yourself through exercise.
6. Give you something to look forward to. Once you have a reasonable schedule for exercising, you will start to look forward to it. When I was in corporate. I lived from this kickboxing class. Everyone in my office knew don’t get in my way on Mondays or Wednesdays. It forced to me to leave work and gave me something healthy to look forward to.
7. Improves concentration. In general exercising helps us to develop the necessary skills to concentrate on the task in hand. You are focusing on breathing, keeping good form and listening to your body. It’s through exercise that I’ve been learning to listen to my body to know what it needs.
8. Feelings of control and achievement. Working is where I really start to see the fruit of setting goals. Sure we all want to hit our fitness goals overnight, but it was my fitness goasl that taught me that taking it step by step day by day got me to my goal. It showed me that hitting your goals takes work, dedication, commitment and consistency. Then you start hitting goals you feel AMAZING and starting feeling this swell of confidence.

Don’t Wait! Get Started Today!

You want to lose weight so you dump carbs, fats, and sugar-rich foods. So, when trying to lose weight you stop eating these foods and focus on other options such as proteins, whole foods, smoothies, green juices, etc. What happens next is total failure and disappointment, as anyone who has ever deprived themselves of certain high calorie foods to lose weight will tell you. So, why does this happen’ Despite efforts to cut back, you are not losing as fast as you want or it’s just stalled. Here are 3 reasons why depriving yourself will not lead to weight loss.

#1: A Self-Deprived Diet Is Guaranteed to Backfire

Whether you have decided to eliminate whole food groups or avoid high-calorie favorites (burgers, chocolate, fries, etc), any diet that consists of depriving yourself is guaranteed to backfire. For starters, such a diet is hard to stick to. You will always want to cheat on it. Chances are super high that you will go back to your old eating habits that caused you to pack on excess fat in the first place. Moreover, the body just is not designed to work beyond its limits. If you have too little food your body will start to store it, thinking that you are starving. Your metabolism will slow down, fat burning will shut down, and the body will begin to hold onto its fat stores in preparation for starvation. So what you thought would help cut fat fast, is not even an effective weight loss method.

I work with my clients to develop healthy eating habits that can be integrated into your lifestyle. It’s all about moderation that has a place for healthy foods and your favorite pizza, wine and cupcakes.

#2: Deprivation Turns You into a Ticking Time Bomb

The first thing most people do is write a list of all the foods that they are no longer eating. When you do this you will only want them MORE! You will find yourself constantly thinking of these foods and craving to indulge in that savory piece of pizza that you have not had in a long time or that creamy ice cream, which always gives you so much comfort. While your “willpower” will let you hold out at first, but the longer you deny yourself, the greater your cravings will grow. Then that willpower battery will snap!!! You will give in to your cravings for some it may not be pretty!!! The worst part is that the period of overeating can last for as long as weeks, months, or even years in some cases.

Deprivation sucks!! I work with my clients to develop healthy eating habits that can be integrated into your lifestyle. It’s all about moderation that has a place for healthy foods and your favorite pizza, wine and cupcakes.

#3: Cutting out Whole Food Groups Is Not Healthy 

It makes me nuts when I hear people talking about I going to lose with so I’m going to cut sugar, carbs, go keto, go vegan, you name it. Sure you may lose weight initially. You will also miss out on other crucial nutrients. Carbs have health boosting benefits for the heart, promote a healthy digestive system, boost energy, and fill the stomach faster. So, cutting out carbs means you will be depriving yourself of essential dietary needs. The same goes for other foods as each food group has its own set of nutrients and benefits. You may also have hunger pangs or headaches.

Seriously, there is no point in depriving yourself to lose weight because such a diet does not even work in the long haul. You’ll end up more frustrated because the weight will come back and bring friends.

Instead, you should work at forming healthy eating habits that can be integrated into your lifestyle. You like your wine”’ Me too, instead of having a glass or 2 every night how about you have a glass every other. A dessert person” If you are in the habit of eating half a gallon of ice cream in one go, reduce that portion to about half a cup and the cut down on the frequency in which you enjoy this creamy delight. By simply applying moderation and watching portion sizes, you can continue enjoying favorites such as pizza and chocolate and still lose weight.

I’d love to hear some of your favorite tips.

When you are trying to lose weight, you’ll want to look at the scale every damn day to prove that you are getting the results. It’s only natural to want some form of reassurance that you are on the right path, something to show for all the sacrifices you are making are worth it. Seriously nothing beats looking down at the scale and realizing that you have lost a pound or two.

Let me break it down like this our bodies change throughout the week. It’s not uncommon for weight to fluctuate a bit from one day to the next. You hop on, on a Monday and you are down three pounds, but then a few days to find that you are two pounds heavier. Your motivation goes out the window.

This is totally natural, yet your motivation goes into the toilet. Then you start playing games to make sure that every time you step on the scale the number is lower and lower.

Sound familiar are you in this viscous cycle’

Repeat after me the scale measures my relationship to gravity. That’s it!!!!

Ready to break free and ditch the scale’ Focus on non scale victories.

How many inches have you lost’
How is your energy’
How is your sleep’
Are you starting to love with you see in the mirror’

Losing weight is not always easy, sometimes it can even feel impossible. When you learn how to focus on the way that you feel, instead of the numbers on the scale, you will take the frustration out of your weight loss journey, and doing that will allow weight loss to happen quickly and naturally.

On this episode by Kim Barnes Jefferson, she has also invited a guest to talk about mom body. The guest is her friend, Keri Mantie who has
been a fitness expert since 1997 and a mother to three boys. She coaches women on fitness and health goals.

The society expects every woman to have a certain body shape after giving birth but that is not the case. Many women are obsessed when it comes to fitness; they are either wondering what they are eating and what fitness activity they are doing.

Your job as a mom is to ensure that you keep your baby alive. You need to do this without worrying how your fitness schedule fits in. Your mindset starts to shift during pregnancy from how you look to what the pregnancy is doing. You are carrying a human being, you have too much on your plate and fitness is not one of them. It is not about the number on the scale.

Do not be hard on yourself. It is not about what you “should do”, it’s about doing your best. If you have done your best, you have done it all. You need to start embracing the
I don’t care attitude. It’s taken me years of telling myself not perfect to come to this mindset. The body will always change on it’s on timeline and you need to accept that. Some days you have to let yourself off the hook. You will still end up showing up.

Many mothers complain of how overwhelming their kids can get but you need to create some time or getting in not going to get done. Even if it’s 15 minutes in your bathrobe or a quick walk around the block with your baby. You need to leave crazy town. Change is going to come and it is okay to adjust your expectations.

Find out your non negotiables. These are things you will do no matter what, for instance a fully nutritious breakfast to get you set for the day. Decide what’ going to work for you. Be careful with social media. It can be a bit overwhelming. There are things that will work for another person but not for you. It can make you feel like you should doing more or you’re lagging behind but you need to shut it all down and stop feeling bad about yourself. You may think you can’t have wine, but I say go ahead and have a glass of wine and take your time.

There are those who can maintain the hardcore routine but for others, it is still not yet time and they cannot make the kind of sacrifices required. There is nothing wrong with that. Simply be where you are. You don’t have to give up what you love, simply ask yourself what do you love most, weigh your options and see what needs moderation and what is a no go zone.

What Do You Learn From This Episode

1. Better ways to reach fitness , fat loss goals without too much restriction
2. Appreciating what your body is doing
3. A different approach focusing on how you feel/ mood during exercise
4. Focusing on doing your best not what you should have done
5. How to get yourself off the hook
6. How to be okay with everything
7. Patience and strength to function
8. Changing your priorities
9. How to manage “ crazy town”
10. Identifying your non negotiable
11. Finding out what works for you and working with it
12. Know where to focus your energy
13. How to be good with choices
14. How to keep the mental noise to the minimal

Links mentioned in this episode

Keri Mantie — http://kerimantie.com
social media — facebook https://www.facebook.com/kerimantiefitnessandnutritioncoach
Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/kerimantie/

Fab Fit Squad — http://kimbarnesjefferson.com
social media — Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/groups/fabfitlife/
Instagram –https://www.instagram.com/fabfitsquad/

My name is Kim Barnes Jefferson; I have a deep passion for guiding others towards fulfillment and success with an emphasis in fitness. I teach busy professional women to stop the extreme dieting/training merry-go-round and start giving themselves permission to live a healthy live without deprivation and guilt.

“If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail.”- Benjamin Franklin

Whatever you want in life you need to set clear goals. It’s great to have ideas and vision, but you need to know how you will take action to make them a reality.

My 5 tips:

→Be precise. Identify what your “end-goal” is and make sure that you have a clear vision of what you want to achieve.

→Be ready. Plan every step that will lead to your goal and decide what’s your first step.

→Be realistic. Reaching a goal requires work and twice that amount of patience to get you there. Break your goals down into 30, 60 and 90 days so that you start to see momentum.

→Be passionate. If you really love what you are doing, it doesn’t matter what situation you are in as long as you are working to achieving your goal. If there is passion within you, the journey you take will surely be meaningful and fulfilling in its own way.

→Be faithful. Avoid the goal cha cha — jumping from one goal to another. When times get tough or it’s going slower than you thought, you will be tempted to give it up, find a new objective, or go in circles, but stick to your plan and understand that failure is a part of the process. If you feel like giving up, go back to number 1, and remind yourself of the reason why you’ve come a long way now.

There can be more things to remember in setting your goal, however, the success of your accomplishing it is entirely in the palm of your hands. Care to begin now’

One of my favorite quotes is Comparison is the thief of joy. Theodore Roosevelt

We are all guilty of it and it’s get even harder in this social media world. We see the world’s highlights. The vacations they are going on, he clients they have just got, the dream wedding, the kids who help with the chores around the house or the loving partner that they have found. If you find yourself gauging your life with that of others, you are not alone.

Sure making comparisons of your looks, possessions or lifestyle to that of others can be a source or motivation, it has its downsides as well. It becomes a problem when you start to gauge your own self-worth based on the accomplishments, qualities or possessions of others. I will share with you  5 reasons why you shouldn’t compare yourself to help you not fall pray the comparison trap.

#1: It Will Straight Up Steal Your Joy

It is natural to want what other people have. When you see this and it makes your cray cray, then it’s time to check yourself.  You maybe sabotaging your own happiness because you will feel mediocre compared to others.

If find your self constantly comparing yourself with others to determine your worth. You will always feel triggered, pissed off and never good enough.

#2: Sets You Up for Failure

You will always feel like you are lacking in something. Every time you look or scroll around, there will always be someone who is more successful, more talented, better looking or generally doing better than you in life. Constantly judging yourself based on what you don’t have, will cause your self-esteem to plummet. It could lead to feelings of never measuring up potentially a viscous cycle into giving up on your goals.

#3: Comparisons Disregard Differences in Personal Circumstances

Most people don’t take into account personal differences between themselves and celebrities or peers they compare themselves to. As a result, successful people come off as overnight sensations while in fact that is never the case. There are no overnight sensations, just so you know!! The truth is we all have struggles and setbacks on the path to success. That is life. You can’t truly judge your own worth by comparing yourself to someone leading a completely different life and in totally different circumstance than yours. I see it all the time, women will look in the magazines and say I wish I had so and so’s abs, or such such’s butt.

Two things I want you to consider.

1. When you make that comparison to the model in the magazine are you willing to do what it takes to do that’
2. The body that you are looking at sometimes is photoshopped.

Instead what if you focused on being the best possible person that you could be.

#4: You Feel Superior’

Do you feel better get a boost in your self-esteem when you feel that some people are “beneath” you’ Sure it feels good, but do you ever grow and get to where you want to be” Instead of trying to pass yourself off as better than everyone else, make comparisons with people who are better than you in one respect or another and use their success as an example you can try to copy.

#5: You Don’t Know The Back Story

Remember you are looking at most people’s highlight reel. There is no such thing as a perfect life. Everyone experiences challenges in their life. Not everyone is perfect nor are their lives. They aren’t always as blissful, happy and perky as everyone thinks.

Stop making yourself crazy by trying to compare yourself with a celebrity or peer you perceive to have a perfect life is setting standards that those people perhaps don’t even match up to. So, the next time you find yourself comparing your life to that of a neighbor, friend or superstar, remember that you don’t necessarily know every detail about their life. One of best things I’ve ever heard is you never know what happens behind closed doors.

Would you like to dive deeper into breaking this habit’‘  In just 21 days, you’ll:

>>>>The ability to create a mindset to bust through the plateaus that have kept you stuck

>>>>The power to stop giving a shit about other people and zero in on what matters to you so that you learn how to create a plan that is unique to you

>>>>A way to set flexible boundaries that don’t leave you feeling trapped and obsessing over what you can and can’t have

Isn’t it time you took the pressure off yourself and gave yourself permission to get a handle on your schedule”

One of of the biggest reasons why people say they can’t work out is because of they are too busy.

If you increased your productivity do you think you could find 30 minutes to make it to the gym, go for a walk, do a little yoga, meditate, take a bath or just sit on your bum.