I’m not reading it cover to cover. Not stressing about “staying on track.”

Each morning, I grab my book…
I take a breath…
And I ask myself: What do I need to hear today?

Then I open the book to whatever page pops up. No rules, no agenda—just trusting the process.

Today’s message?

“Each choice I’ve made in the past is exactly the way it should be.“

Whew. That hit.

From there, I grabbed my journal and started writing. Pages poured out about how my “mistakes” weren’t failures… they were signs. Little indicators telling me when I was headed in the wrong direction. And now? I’m choosing to see them as course-correctors. Don’t get me wrong at the time I did beat myself up, but as they say hindsight is 20/20.

Here’s the cool part: I’m working on something new right now—something I’m so freaking excited about. Honestly, more fired up than I’ve been in a long time.

This summer, I’m giving myself space to map it out, bring it to life, and do it in a way that feels fun and aligned (aka no more forcing, no more hustle-for-hustle’s sake).

If you’ve been needing a reset or craving a little clarity—maybe this is your permission slip:
👉 You don’t have to start perfectly.
👉 You don’t have to follow a set plan.
👉 You can trust what you need to hear, today.

P.S. Want to follow along? I’m sharing the journey here + on IG @kimjeffersoncoach or come hang out in my Facebook group! And if you’re diving back into your own mindset work, DM me… I’d love to cheer you on!

The post How I’m Using May Cause Miracles for Daily Journaling Without the Pressure appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

BUTT… for some us when we try to get into action our fear keeps are feet glued to the fucking floor and we don’t have the courage to make it happen. But YOU CAN BE COURAGEOUS, and you can become unstuck.

One of the things I loved so much about Ashley is that she founded The Courage Campaign, which is a nonprofit organization that provides public schools and communities with high-caliber physical fitness instruction combined with personal development and Social and Emotional Learning (SEL).  Her background and upbringing have taught her to successfully navigate failure, fear, and discrimination, and use adversity to redefine her own success.  She now aims to share what she’s learned and help others to unlock passion, invoke courage, and reinvent achievement. And she is starting with the younger generation to help “create strong minds and bodies today that will help build a positive tomorrow.”

We have to transform our fears in order to accomplish things that we set out to do.  It’s human nature to be afraid and we are always going to be afraid of something… that will never go away, but it’s about knowing what is an excited fear and what is the “run for your freaking life” fears.  And we have to learn how to get over those fears that are stopping us from reaching our true potential… ACTION breeds confidence and courage, so if you want to get over those fears, you have to get up and do something about it. 

There is this amazing book that Ashley and I were talking about in this podcast and that is The Gift Of Fear By

Gavin de Becker.  “True Fear is a gift. Unwarranted fear is a curse. Learn how to tell the…
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This book is amazing because it really dives into fears, how to differentiate between the 2 types of fears like the ones that give us those gut feeling cues that are innate to us as human beings and we know is a bad situation and fears that are just holding us back from accomplishing something.  I bring this up because we have to learn how to phase through those fears that are not bad but just holding us back, in order to reach these goals that we are striving for.

A huge hurdle to overcome, is not being in our own bodies.  Not fully understanding ourselves and our bodies.  We don’t know what it feels like to feel good, we don’t know if we are scared to grab enough that we have to run and grab our handbag, and we don’t know if we are just too scared or charged up to try something.  So, it is so important to just slow down, reevaluate things and find ourselves.  Really stop and get within your body to understand who you are, what you want and find out what is stopping you and getting in the way of you accomplishing those goals and building up the courage to reach out and grab what it is that you truly want.

I think this pandemic with COVID has really taught us to build up that courage to venture back out again as things reopen, to go to the grocery store, or just go to places.  Yes we have learned to slow down and slow our busy lives, but this was a scary time for many people, the fear of the unknown, the fear of our economy or the state of their families and it has taken a great deal of courage for so many people to get over that fear and begin their lives again.  We were held up inside for so long, and yes it worked for many.  Their lives slowed down, they learned things, they grew as individuals, but there are sooo many others on the other side of this that were affected dramatically by this in negative ways that now need to dig out of where they are to re-emerge again post COVID and it is taking them all the courage they can get to rebuild their lives again.

For Ashley, the Courage Campaign was built out of a period of grief and fear after her father passed away.  Growing up, Ashley saw in her household 2 parents who were  perfect examples of discipline, hard work, courage, and more because her parents were both hard-working and held that very valuable. Her dad being a professional boxer and Postman and her mother working and going to college at the same time she emulated those images of resilience that she saw throughout her life.

Her parents allowed for her to fail and discover our own courage and own resilience, right wrong or indifferent. “My upbringing was such that, sort of black culture in general, black parents don’t coddle their children. I think it is born out of generational trauma and knowing what we are going to face when we get older, so there isn’t a lot of being overprotective or putting us in a bubble.  When your skin is brown, you have to prepare to be a human in a different way than if it was not brown.”  -Ashley Mitchell Why You Really Need Courage Podcast 

After her parents got divorced, she learned that you don’t sit in sorrow or in grief, you have to pick yourself up and keep going.  You cannot hold on to it and you have to learn from it, grow and continue your life.   And she knew this to hold true after her father passed away and knew that she could not sit in grief forever.  Her athletic background is what actually “healed” her and got her through that time in her life.  She used that to become a fitness instructor and utilized her creative artist side to write a lot more.  Until one day Ashley and her partner, who is also the co-founder of the company realized that they could take her resilience and what she has learned throughout her life and teach it to other people to help them to become more resilient. 

For years we have had to learn to PIVOT.. Shit is always going to happen in our lives, and you could either lay down or figure it out.  And of course, it’s okay to lay down for a minute or 2, but don’t sit in that shit for too long.  Get up and keep on moving forward and don’t dwell on the negative things for too long.

Do you have the courage to stop being so reliant upon other people and asking for permission all the time’

Do you have the courage to know your intuition to tell you what is right and what is wrong’

Do you have the courage to stop relying on other people to walk you through the changes in your life and actually take on the responsibility and accountability for yourself’

Do you have the courage to stop looking for the fastest and easiest way out and actually have patience in trying to change your body or reach a specific fitness goal’

Do you have the courage to step away from that Amazon Prime way of thinking and know that you are not going to change your entire life and your body in a matter of 2 days’

Do you have the courage to try new things, fail and keep on moving forward to see what will work to get you closer to your goals’

Do you have the courage to STEP BACK and say what it is that I want for my life”’

Right now, I want you to get the courage to stop comparing yourself to people you see on INSTAGRAM!! We never know what someone is going through to look the way they look, in a good way or a bad way.  You don’t know who has eating disorders or who is super healthy, or if they have an underlying health problem that causes them to not gain weight.  We just have no idea what is happening behind that image, we only see a picture, a 6 pack or flat stomach and big tits, and we say that person has something that I don’t have, and I want that!  And you spiral down the rabbit whole of comparison.

YOU have the courage to step back and say I DON’T HAVE TO BE PERFECT!
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Our mission is to GIVE YOU THE COURAGE  to realize that you can be healthy without that big box of CRAZY all the time!  Ashley and I want so badly for people to believe that they are enough, just the way they are but there is nothing wrong with self-improvement.  This doesn’t mean to let all of your shit go, but there are ways to enjoy your body and work hard for it but  also enjoy your personal relationships and not always be thinking about,  “I can’t eat this bun on my burger.”  Or saying I am not eating french fries, I am eating a salad!! NOOO eat fucking fries.  It is about BLENDING NOT BANNING! 

There are 2 things that I absolutely adore and that is BELIEF and COURAGE.  I believe in courage.  In order to have courage you have to have a belief that whatever it is you are trying to achieve, that you can do it!!  To do that, sometimes you can just trust and believe that something is going to come. Have the belief that there is a higher power helping to guide you.  And that higher power doesn’t remove difficulty from your life but meets you where you are and helps to get you where you need to go.

There will be a lesson in what you learn and in the difficulties you face.  But these lessons will be what teaches you to not go down that road again when you see the same thing happening.  You have to be in that relationship with your mind and body so you can recognize what is happening.  You have to have these experiences so that you can have courage to face adversities and difficult times and overcome them with confidence and the knowledge that you need to do so.  With this you will build COURAGE and you will become stronger and get unstuck from where you are in life right now!

I encourage you to look into my girl, Ashley.  She is truly amazing; she is so inspiring and really one of a kind!

What makes you feel magical’

“What makes me feel magical is a time like this.  I want to say time makes me feel magical but that’s just not deep enough.  Time to continue to get to know me, Ashley, makes me feel magical. That is where I feel I find my power and direction when there is no noise and it is me, being me, deciding how I want to continue being me. I want all of those selves to always be integrated. I never want someone to look at my IG and talk to me and say that is a different person.  I value that. I value being truly me at all times.”

LINKS:

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/FabFitSquad

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic/

Website: https://kimbarnesjefferson.com/

Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fit-girl-magic-healthy-living-for-women-over-40/id1476883661

The Gift of Fear Gavin De Becker https://amzn.to/3ghfnjK

socials

@ashleymitchfit

@the.courage.campaign

www.thecouragecampaign.com

Conversations in Courage, The Podcast:

Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/2CLFjVsZoy6R52fhfITISi’si=co_QmHKrR3q6z6S_LGlASg

Itunes https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/conversations-in-courage/id1522983874

The post Why Your Really Need Courage appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

Some routines are so elusive that we feel like we are chasing shadows most of the time and routines today are quickly looked upon as “boring”. Our society is conditioned to want instant gratification. Right now, RIGHT AWAY!  And this same thing goes for workouts. We are conditioned to change things every single day, and if you do change then you are doing something right. But it is in those routines that we do every day over and over again that is what is really going to lead to success.

How are you defining success”

This is the first thing I ask every single client that I work with. I ask this because years ago when I started working with a business coach, she asked me this question. That question made me take a giant pause because I don’t think many people take the time to define what success looks like for them. You may hear about success for other people and think that you want it, but seriously what do YOU want!! Why are you working so hard’ If you aren’t working towards your goal, what will motivate you to take consistent action.

I ask the question because I want to understand if you have created realistic goals. And then I follow up with Are you excited about that goal’ Can that goal be planned into your life’ Is that goal sustainable’And that my friends is what I call my REPS formula!! As you are building your routine you want to make sure that the end goal is realistic. It’s sustainable and can map it INTO YOUR LIFE!

Many will say routines are boring, but I will say routines are the gateway to success. They help us to establish priorities, help us to stop procrastinating and help us to track our goals. Plus, it helps us to get stuff done!

So, here is an example of that.

I have defined my goal and in the next 12 weeks, I want to drop a dress size or 6 pounds. I start by putting together a plan and look at my routine to see what I am doing on a day in and day out basis to lead you to my result.  While writing this plan, it is easy for us to procrastinate.have to find the right diet, trainer, coach, gym schedule, blah blah blah! It is not about doing 50 different things to drop that dress size, it is me getting my mindset shifted so that I am going to do this and be so crystal clear about what it is we are trying to achieve.

First, we are going to DEFINE YOUR SUCCESS. I already mentioned this above a little bit, and I don’t want this to make you feel stressed out. So, keep it simple and grab out that piece of paper. I want you to go old school and write some things down throughout this blog to help you a little bit better!

Now, let’s LOOK AT OUR ROUTINES. Do these goals you have set for yourself make you feel good or stressed out’? You should have a little pressure, but not a TON! What are your current routines day in a day out to lose those 6 pounds’? Am I tracking my food’ Am I sleeping’ Am I stressed’? It all adds up, it all counts. Write down your routine today on that same sheet of paper and sleep on it. Take out that paper and write what is working and what is not working and go through that routine.? Look at those routines and be very honest with yourself and if you can’t, that is when you hire a coach or get a friend that is not afraid to tell you. This list will be pretty telling because our routines are our guidepost. It’s something that tells you, “Hey Girl You Are off course!

Success needs to feel like something you are marching towards. It should feel effortless. As you write this list, I want you to think about this.  What do you look forward to doing and are you excited about it’ And if you are not excited, what can you do now to tweak this, so you feel more excited about it’  With the list, review your daily activities. Are these things getting you closer to your 6-pound weight loss’ And if it’s not, start reviewing those daily activities. Weight loss doesn’t have to be a struggle, it doesn’t have to be a grind. You can choose differently.

Give yourself 2-week sprints to see where you and how you are doing. So, the next 2 weeks, what am I going to commit to’ Tracking food’ Going to the gym 3 days a week’ Water’ Small micro-commitments it what is necessary so that you can see that progress. And don’t focus on THE SCALE. Come up with non-scale victories. Things that you can feel and see you are doing to say you are on the right path.

Now that you see what is working and not working, you can work on a DAILY SCHEDULE. This isn’t what you think it is either!  Trust me, I don’t like being strictly confined to a schedule All it means is that you want to give yourself some guidance, but I do not want your day to live by the clock.  Just start by giving yourself 3 things to do every single day. (3 tasks to complete in the day). Start small instead of trying to make a list of 500 things because when you only finish 5 out of the 400, you feel like crap and will be hard on yourself, so start small.

Let’s also be sure to take into consideration flexible accountability. You are just playing and seeing what is working and not working as you go along. What do you have to change’ How do you have to change it’ And reduce the scope of how much activity you really have to do! If you can’t fit in 3 hours at the gym, that is okay, fit in 30 minutes of a workout at home. As long as you are moving your body than you got this! (And the same goes for food. Create a menu, meal prep, and be prepared.)

At the end of the day, routines help us become the people we want to be. Start thinking about your current routine, how does it work and how does it guide you to your success. But you CANNOT miss STEP 1, DEFINE WHAT SUCCESS LOOKS LIKE SO YOU CAN BUILD A ROUTINE!!

If you are lost and need a little more guidance, grab my 50 Routines to Start. And omg, YOU DON’T have to do all 50, this list is just a great brainstorming tool to help get you started today magic makers!!

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/FabFitSquad

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic/

Website: https://kimbarnesjefferson.com/

Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fit-girl-magic-healthy-living-for-women-over-40/id1476883661

The post The Power of A Daily Routine appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

You’re working crazy hours, kids activities, maybe caring for aging parents, technology is making physical activity easier to avoid, and in the current state of the world stress is taking its toll on our bodies. Considering all these obstacles, it can be difficult to get in the physical activity that we need.  

Then there are those days that you just feel lazy or unmotivated to workout. Days when you find fitness boring, too difficult or they simply just don’t want to do it. 🤷🏽‍♀️

I’m here to ask that you don’t give up!      

With all these factors working against you, let me be the first to tell you that can have good health even if getting up the motivation to workout seems impossible.

Here are five easy ways to sneak exercise into your day without feeling overwhelmed. In fact, you may actually look forward to them!

1. Make It A Game

This is a trick that many parents and teachers use to make children do things (you don’t know anything about this😉) that they are unmotivated to do. It works! Try it on yourself.

You don’t feel like doing a monotonous 45-minute jog on a treadmill, and that’s understandable. Who does’ Hop of the treadmill. Take your run outside, run to one telephone pole and walk to the next. Run the next two telephone pole and walk the next two telephone phone and move up to four telephone poles. It’s a great way to break it up the run. Not a runner you can walk to a telephone pole do 10 jumping jacks walk to the next telephone pole do 10 pushups the next telephone pole 10 high knees.

I think you are picking up what I’m putting down. No telephone poles” You can use trees, street signs, mailboxes so many landmarks to choose from.

2. Sneak It Into a Lazy Activity

It’s been a long day. Work was hectic, school was stressful, the kids were crazy, and life is hard! 😤 The last thing you want to do when you are finally done with your daily responsibilities is work up a sweat! You want to unwind on the couch with a glass of pinot and watch your favorite show on Netflix, scroll through social media, or read a good book.

The call of the couch and the remote is strong I get it.  Could you consider sneaking in a couple minutes of fast-paced aerobic activity such as jumping jacks, high knees, or bicycle crunches for about 15 minutes, maybe a quick yoga stretch to unwind before you scroll through your Netflix queue.  

Feeling strong, you can use commercials as the time to do jump squats, or for each new chapter in your book means you have to complete 4 rounds of 45-second (jumping jacks, burpees, kettlebell swings or speed skaters)

Sneaking in a little fitness here and there doesn’t take away the value of your activity. As long as you keep them close enough together, your heart rate will stay elevated and your body will benefit!

3. Make It Social

We’ve all been a bit cooped up these past few months. If you keep 6 feet apart it’s great to workout with someone. Studies show that most people perform better in a social environment. With gyms opening back it, maybe you’ll venture out to take a class. Or have you been taking live virtual classes’ When you are working as a group to accomplish a goal it makes you feel more competitive, you try a little harder and you go a little faster. Apply this to your workout!

4. Add It To Your Chores

 We all errands that we run and chores to do. Why not pick up the pace and get these tasks done not only faster but also kill two birds with one stone’ Are you doing laundry, scrubbing the tub, or mowing the lawn with boredom and little effort’ The quicker you get them done the quicker you can move on to what you really want to do and you are working out!

Don’t know if you are really getting an aerobic exercise’ An easy way to tell if you are getting the benefit of an aerobic exercise is if you can talk but with a little difficulty. You should feel winded but not to the point of exhaustion. You will feel so accomplished after these errands; your high will carry you through the rest of the day.

5. 20 Minutes or Less

Many people have the mistaken idea that you need to put in an excruciating hour everyday to consider it as a workout. Not so! Even a workout of as little as twenty minutes, maybe even less, can be an effective aerobic workout. To measure a great workout. You should be breathing heavy, work up a little bit of a sweat and feel a burning in your muscles.

The key is intensity! If you don’t have the time to put in a long workout, don’t fret. Muster yourself up and do a quick but intense workout regimen that may be hard while you do it but over before you know it! Every Friday I post a Fat Burning Friday in my Facebook group.

Want to make a commitment’ Join my new Beat the Summer Slide challenge!  

The post Do You Ever Feel Lazy and Unmotivated To Workout’ appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

1. UNPLUG-–  It’s not about the hustle. Tune out the exercise more voices in your head. Schedule time in your calendar, maybe every Sunday morning or an hour before bed each night. It doesn’t have to be a huge block of time – just enough to give your brain some rest from always being plugged into everything that’s going on in our world.
2. ONLY HAVE ONE GOAL — I get it you want to be “back” where you were pre Coronavirus. Ladies pump the break. You WILL get back there, but rushing won’t be the way. STOP putting so much pressure on yourself for it to happen overnight. One of the top ways to get motivated and stay that way is to focus on one goal at a time. Give it your total focus and appreciate each little step, letting the small victories add up.
3. GET A  COACH — One of the best ways to get motivated is to hold yourself accountable to someone else. This is one of the reasons why you get a coach. It’s nice to have someone who looks over your shoulder and give you feedback that you are either moving in the right direction toward your goals or you need to course correct. Want to have a conversation to see how coaching would benefit you, hop on my calendar right here. for a FREE consultation. 
4. GET ENOUGH SLEEP — Sleep is like fuel – our bodies need it to maintain health and well-being. When you are dragging ass the last thing you want to do workout and damn sure you don’t want to eat right! I just did a podcast on this, so if sleeping is a challenge for you, have a listen right here.
5. KNOW YOUR WHY — When you are clear about what it is you want. You have all the motivation that you need. It’s my why that gets me out of bed on those cold dark mornings. Keep in mind the reason you when wanted to get healthier in the first place and you’ve found your motivation! 
6. TAKE A WALK — Walking is my jam! I was first told to walk to help me balance my hormones and to lower my stress levels. You ladies over 40 may want to take note. Besides, walking gets your blood flowing to your brain and extremities, and if you’ve been sitting at a desk or workstation for a long period, a brisk walk can help to get you re-energized and refocused on the task that needs to be conquered. 
7. SET A TIMER — Not feeling a workout’ I set a timer for 15 minutes and do whatever I can in 15 minutes. Then decide if you feel like more go for it, if you feel you’ve done all you can move in. Sometimes my workout is a foam roll and a good stretch and other times it turns into a full workout. 
8. SHARE YOUR GOAL — I have a Facebook Group, where you can share your goal and have other in the group cheer you on to victory. Who knows you may inspire someone to take action
9. STAY HYDRATED — Our bodies are made up of up to 65% water. To get the party started keep a bottle of water in my bathroom and start drinking it as soon as I get up in the morning. Another way to get in your water is to get a cup that you only fill with water and keep it with you all day long. Set a goal for yourself (start small, remember) and then when you reach that goal for the day, reward yourself with a different type of beverage.
10. LET GO OF THE OUTCOME —  We all put so much pressure on ourselves to accomplish, that we push ourselves into exhaustion. Don’t worry how it’s going to turn out or if it will be done within the time frame you’ve allotted. Just let go and see how freeing it is. Be clear about what is that you want and how will you feel when you finally achieve it. 

Of these tips what feels good right now. Leave me a comment below.

If meal prep is that will motivate you to eat healthy — grab my free guide right here. 

The post How Get And Stay Motivated appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

To create a strong habit it comes down to having a strong enough desire to lose weight and get healthy.

It is very easy to view weight loss as a temporary state. How many times have you said to yourself that you can manage to eat this way for a couple of weeks’ You may have even lasted a few weeks longer. But has this led to long term success’ Probably not, as it wasn’t sustainable.  

First you need to really dig down deep and discover what your reasons are for losing weight. Has your doctor told you to drop some pounds for health reasons’ Are you totally sick of not fitting into your clothes’ Want to look good in pics on your next vacation’ Take the time to find your reasons and then write them down.  

Your next step will be to figure out how you can make these changes into your life. What time do you have for exercising and cooking healthy meals’ If your time is limited, then look at cooking in batches and freezing portions.

The same applies to workouts, what workouts do you like and when can you fit this in’ Do early morning’s work, lunch time, after work’

Now you are ready to start forming your new habits. Remember that you don’t have to change things overnight. Start out by cutting down on one or two items. Eating more veggies, adding in more good fats or having few treats. Then when you feel you have this under control, change another aspect.

Combining eating healthier with exercising can really help speed up your results. Make a commitment to leisure walk for 20 minutes three times a week. Do this for three weeks and your walking habit will be ingrained in you. Then you can either add in another day or walk for longer each time.

To get your exercise in early in the day try getting up 30 minutes earlier. Or if you take public transport, take an earlier bus and get off one or two stops earlier.

Forming a new habit doesn’t have to mean completely changing your lifestyle, it means just adding one or two new steps into your routine for the better.

Want to know your fitness personality’ Click here

The post Are You Ready to Form Solid Weight Loss and Exercise Habits appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

They seem simple enough. It’s all about changing the way you are living, you need to make a choice. During our conversation, Maria pointed out that some people don’t even realize they have a choice, they can take another path. If that sounds like you, I’m telling you right now — you can do it! There’s an easier path.

Maria pointed out during our conversation, we often get pulled into everyone else’s definition of success that we forget who we are and what we want out of life. The first step is getting clear on how you DEFINE success is how do you want to design your life, how do you want to get paid, when you want to work.

What Maria and I both realized was that in order to get to our new lives, we had to break up with the old one. There’s this myth that successful people just jump into their day, ready to go. But that’s not true. They wake up and meditate or go to the gym; they have to work their way into success each day. It’s not an immediate or overnight transformation. It’s a gradual thing that literally happens one change at a time, each change giving you more courage to make the next change.

What gets you from one mini-goal to the next on your way to your big goal is the connection you have with that big goal. If I told you to get up at 5:30 a.m. to work out, that’s probably not going to happen for you. Unless you have some kind of connection to that goal, it’s not going to be sustainable.

What are your choices’
Are you choosing to be in the overwhelm’
Are you choosing to be in the hustle’ Or are you choosing ebb and flow’

Because I’ll tell you being in the ebb and flow, is an amazing feeling and has reinforced my decision to break free of the hustle.
Like Maria, as I’m making my choices, I’m very careful not to compromise on my own beliefs or the how I want to feel. As Maria pointed out during our conversation, “it’s about having the courage to say no, but also having the courage to pause and say, ‘Hold on. Is what I’m doing giving me the results that I want to see’ If I’m doing something and I’m not seeing results that I want. It’s time for me to think about doing something differently. Let me look at this in a different way and see how I can achieve my goal without sacrificing my process.

“What is that process’

I call it the “5 Cs” to make it easy to remember. The first step is making that choice. Then get clear, make a connection. That will give you the courage to stay committed.

Bottom line, trust yourself and make the decisions that are right for you, no more trying to keep up with the joneses. Want to dig deeper or need a little more help’ Tune in to the podcast then join us for our five day masterclass to help you get clear on how to make 2020 effortless.

Resources Dr. Mel Robbins https://melrobbins.com/about/

Five Day Masterclass – Jumpstart The New Decade– https://fabfitsquad.lpages.co/5-days-next-decade-kim

Links
Maria on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/maria.k.tan
Maria on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/maria_k_tan/
Fit Girl Magic, https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic/
Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/kimjeffersoncoach/

The post Are You Ready For Life To Feel Effortless appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

Give yourself a break, this this happens to everyone. In fact, a recent study that focused on trends of motivation in the workplace, found that companies lose $300 billion dollars annually due to a lack of productivity.

How can you beat this behavior’

1. Set a Goal
   Goal setting is the beginning step towards organizing your direction. Set a clear and meaningful goal that you keep in your thoughts. By having a target to focus on, this makes your journey clear. If your end–goal is rather large, set tiny milestones in-between to keep your momentum going. Celebrate when you meet your mini goals to maintaining your motivation!
   
2. Plan and Prioritize Tasks
   In order to take action, you have to make a plan. Imagine heading out on vacation without a plan! If heading to the beach you’d plan to bring sunscreen, bugspray, a bathing suit and a hat. You’d plan ahead so you aren’t scrambling or buying all these things when you get there. The same can be said about your fitness and nutrition. Do you make a plan’
   
3. Have a plan b
   This builds off of the last tip. Life is busy and hectic and doesn’t always go as planned. The key is to decide what you are going to be proactive and know what you are going to do when you hit a problem. A few questions to consider when faced with obstacles are:
   ❓What Can I do to Make this Run Smoothly’
   ❓What Can I Personally Control Immediately’
   ❓What Resources Do I Currently Have to Help Me to Solve This Problem
   Prepare for any possible roadblock that may prevent you from hitting your goals. Some productive individuals have a plan B, C, D, and E! Think about what could go wrong and have a useful backup plan to rely on.
   
4. Create a Schedule; Personal Accountability
   Learn how to properly delegate your time through creating a set schedule for you to follow. This will help build discipline and accountability. Analyze when you feel the most productive.
   
   Is it during the early morning, or late afternoon’ Decide when you have the mental clarity to complete your tasks and create your schedule around those time. In addition, hold yourself responsible for your personal success.
   
   Eliminate blaming outside sources as making excuses for your lack of action. Instead, take personal responsibility for your actions and set up realistic consequences. Remember, you are your biggest motivator!
   
5. Analyze All Possible Outcomes
   Strategic chess players analyze their future moves by thinking two to three steps ahead. This means envisioning every possible move and how you can counter it. Can you do the same thing with your health and fitness goals’
   
6. Take Initiative; Pay attention to Detail
   The act of being proactive is defined as, “Getting shit done.” This requires taking initiative when you see activities that need to be accomplished. Paying attention to detail involves ensuring that everything surrounding your task is running smoothly. Pay attention to what is going on around will ensure that you stay the course.
   
7. Embrace Change When Necessary
   The definition of insanity is performing the same action while hoping for a different outcome. To see a change, you need to make a change. To get the results you are seeking the change may be easy or may be a little more difficult that you will feel resistance. Be open minded to trying new things as they may reveal solutions to the path of your goal.
   
8. Redirect Your Focus; Emotional Regulation
   Regulating your emotions is key to avoiding unnecessary stress. When facing a problem, do you feel an overwhelming sense of anxiety’ Do you start to fixate on all that could go wrong’ Focusing on all that can go wrong is counterproductive and de motivating. Allowing yourself to become overly emotional can detract you from achieving your goal. Learn how to focus on what you can control and look for solutions.
   
9. Watch Your Circle of Influence
   In order to be proactive, you have to surround yourself with like minded individuals. They say you are the sum of the five people surround yourself with. Who are you five’
   
10. Avoid Burn-Out Through Self-Care
    I know self-care seems like a waste of time, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Self-care helps you to keep your sanity when engaging in productive activities. It is so easy to become consumed in your work or family that your personal needs are pushed aside. Take some time to decompress and rejuvenate yourself so you can continue on your road to success!

Being proactive doesn’t involve complicated life changes that inhibit your fun. Rather, they are small improvement points that will assist you towards reaching your goals!

Are you ready to make a change’ Join me in the 5 Days To Effortless Weight Loss

The post 10 Ways To Be More Proactive In Your Life appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

What do I mean by flexible dieting’ Typically, we’ve been programmed that in order to lose weight, get fit, get healthy, we have to follow some particular program be it Keto, Weight Watchers, Whole30, Paleo. There’s some formalized blueprint program that I’ve got to follow if I want to have any results.

Recently my sister posted on Facebook that she lost 50 pounds and all the comments were, “Girl, what did you do'” And everyone wanted to know what the Holy Grail was, and basically she was like, “Well, my Holy Grail was I stopped drinking wine every night and I started moving my body.” What diet is that’ Is that the Kendra’ That’s basics for me, as a fitness professional that is fitness 101 – stop eating crap and move your body. Oh my god, I could write a whole book and make millions on that, it’s not rocket science. 

Break Up With The Plan

My concept of flexible dieting is that you get to break up with “the plan”. You’ve been marketed to for years, decades about “the plan”. I was recently listening to a podcast All About Fat, and the woman spent five years researching fat, and what I mean by fat is I’m talking about body fat, fat in foods, anything that has to do with fat she spent five years studying it and breaking it down.

If you have looked at any history, if you go back in colonial times if someone was fat, they were wealthy. Fat was something to be aspired to. If we also look back into the 50s and 60s it was very aspirational to be curvy. And then at some point someone said, “You need to be a size two, weigh three pounds and eat grapes all day.” And we all got obsessed with dieting. Which leds us to where we are today obsessed with what “diet” program and what plan are you following.

This is what I know – you can follow a plan until the plan doesn’t work, and the plan doesn’t work for a myriad of reasons. This is where flexible dieting comes in. Let me just back up, let’s first do vocabulary.

When I talk about diet, I don’t mean a plan, that’s not what I mean. When I say diet, I’m talking about what you physically put into your mouth, what you are eating; that’s what I’m calling a diet. And so, we need to look at what we’re currently eating before we can make an assessment. It’s like if I were to go to the doctor and say, “These are my symptoms”, that’s exactly what your diet is. Your diet shows me what you are currently eating, because for the most part most of the women I work with eat pretty good. What I mean is you’re eating probably about 70%, and all it takes is a few minor tweaks and you’re going to start to see some of the results.
Pulp Fiction Diet

And we all know the foods that we should be eating a little less of, and we know the foods we should be eating a little more of; that’s not the problem. The problem is we feel like we need to follow this particular train track and this train track is going to lead us to the glory land, the diet mecca.

Have you ever see the movie, Pulp Fiction‘ If you haven’t seen the movie, two guys are looking for this suitcase, and you don’t really know what’s in the suitcase but every time you see the suitcase open it has this glow. And that’s what people are searching for. They’re searching for their diet Pulp Fiction. They’re looking for that glow, that feeling that’s just going to be like, “I made it.” And then guess what’

When you’ve made it, you’ve got to sustain it’ That’s where people fall down and that’s where flexible dieting comes in, because flexible dieting is sustainable, flexible dieting is about you. I got some questions for you to answer when you look at a plan or a program. Don’t go for what’s popular. Right now, everyone’s on Keto for days. But for some people eating that much fat is too much; eating that little carb may make you feel like someone ran over you and then backed up three times.

Question Yourself

How do you eat’
What are the foods that you like to eat’
What’s your lifestyle’

Because if it’s something that requires you to cook and you’re just like, “That’s not about me”, what’s your budget’ Are you having to buy all these magical elixirs, are you going to have to buy high-end things’ What does it look like’ And how long can you see yourself doing this’

About two years ago I had to go vegan and it was mainly just to clean up my hormones.

I knew it was short-term, but for me

I knew that lifestyle wasn’t sustainable.

I knew I could do it for six months.

I knew that I could totally gut this out for six months. But could I do this for the next 60 years’ Oh, hell no! Because for me it was a lot of cooking, and I cook, but I don’t want to have to cook every single meal. And I don’t like tofu, so to go out, it was always like you’re vegan; tofu. No. There’s more to life than tofu for vegans. 🤯

So, I need you to answer those questions and be honest with yourself. I want you to look at things as, “Could I do this for the next year’ Could I do this for the next five years’ Could I do this for the next 10 years'” And if you say no, then that’s not the plan for you. 

The All or Nothing Approach

You have to decide what your approach is. When I say, “Hey, what’s your approach'” many people will tell me, “I’m just all or nothing. I’m either on it, or I’m off it.” And I’m like, “How has that served you'” When you are so gung-ho like, “I got to be on this train track to the diet destination, or I’m just sitting on the couch with a straw and a bottle of wine, pass the Ho-Hos and the Goldfish, how has that lifestyle served you where you’re like hardcore, no core, hardcore, no core’

Wouldn’t you want it to be different’

Because I see it, I see it in your faces, I hear it in your voices when you’re just like, “I can’t anymore. I want to be able to go on vacation, I want to be able to walk into my closet, and not stress that those pair pants from last spring are going to fit over my ass.” I want you to have that confidence like, “I’m going to my closet and anything in here is going to fit my ass.”

Think about the potential, how hard is it going be’ How much weight are you trying to lose’ Will you have to give up foods that you love’ What will you need to sustain this’ And what are the thoughts that you have as you are reading through the do’s and the don’ts, what are your thoughts’ Because at the end of the day a lot of people are knowledge brokers, they can take in all the knowledge, they can listen to information, they can listen to podcasts, they can watch all the YouTube videos and take all the notes, analyze till next Thursday, but still not take the action. 

The action is where the rubber meets the road, and until I actually take that big step back and I analyze what I am doing and then decide where I want to go, I can’t take action. And I find that a lot of people, and I’ve talked about this, you’ve got to set goals, and you have to be not afraid to set goals because I get it, you may have disappointed yourself in the past.

Have I hit every goal I’ve ever set’ Heck no, not at all. But I know the pain of me being in the same place again and again and again and running into the same wall over and over again, bugs the fuck out of me. And I don’t want to be in that position, so whenever I do miss my goal, I ask myself why, and I don’t beat myself up, I give myself the grace and I say, “Did I bite off more than I could chew’ Was there something else going on in my life that I couldn’t give it the focus’ And I try to give myself that grace, give myself that space to focus.

Work the Plan

Back in the day I will admit I’d be like, “You suck, you’re stupid, you can’t ever do it.” And where did that get me’ Nowhere. So, I took a step back. If you can’t take that step back, that’s why you work with a coach or an accountability partner because they could be that third party to be like, “Okay girl, here’s where you give yourself that grace. Here’s where you give yourself that space, that time so that you can do a CSI.”

You’ve watched the show – they come in, dead body on the floor, and they piece together, “Okay, the broken lamp, so she must have fallen here, someone must have walked in there.” We all know, and that’s what you do. Before you get into action you kind of say, “This is where I’ve been, this is where I want to go, and we’re going to piece together the plan in order for you to get there.” But I don’t want you to just plan the plan, I want you to plan to say, “I got to move my tushy.”

On a Scale of 1 to 10…

Here is where I like to keep it simple; I like to make my action plan really simple. So, for me to assess where you are, for me to assess where I am, is what I’m currently eating, my diet, am I hungry’ On a scale of one to ten where ten means I’m going to eat my arm to zero being I’m stuffed to the gills, where am I’ The second thing is how is my energy’ Do I feel like woo-hoo all day long, or do I feel like I’m crashing and burning’ Do I feel like I’m always wanting to take a nap’ Am I living off of coffee’ Where am I’ And the same thing, zero meaning I’m bouncing off the walls; ten meaning I’m almost at a coma. Where are you when it comes to your energy’ And then cravings, are you in the place that you’re craving’ Zero being like every craving is knocking on the door and you’re white-knuckling it; ten, what cravings’ I don’t know what those are, I don’t have any. 

Those are the first three questions that I ask, then I go into non-food questions. Sleep, are you sleeping’ And are you getting quality sleep’ Some people will tell me, “Yeah, I sleep six hours.” But then they’ll tell me, “Well, I go to the bathroom and then I’m up for an hour after I go to the bathroom, or I toss and turn so I’m not really getting a good night’s sleep.” Are you moving’ I’ve talked about this before. I wear a Fitbit because I really want to make sure that I’m getting in my 10,000 steps, so are you’ Some people work out and then they sit at the desk all day long and that’s it, their only movement is to get up and go to the bathroom. Are you moving’ And then what’s your stress level’ Are you like again on that zero to ten, zero meaning people are like, “Girl, are you alive'” to like, “You’re running around with your hair on fire.” Where are you’ Because all of these factors will weigh heavily into what you’re taking in for your diet. 

And if you noticed, most of my questions weren’t about are you eating this superfood’ Are you eating that vegetable’ It wasn’t about that. It’s like in this moment in time, is what you’re eating serving you based on this base level of criteria’ And I’ve seen it all over the interwebs, and you see it too, the questions like, “What’s the best fat burning food’ What’s the best sugar-free food’ How do you feel about protein ice cream’ How do I feel about [insert the question]'”

Do those questions inspire you to take action’ Or do they ask you to ask more questions and not take the action’ That’s the question I have for you. If my questions do not inspire, then I need to ask better questions. My boyfriend, Tony Robbins, always says ask better questions and you’ll get better answers. 

Get Into Action

When I’m in that action phase I’m all about what is it going to take for me to move my feet’ What is it going to take for me to go from what I know I want to where I want to go’ And then I’ve got to say, “What are the results’ Is my current diet yielding my results'” If my goal is to lose my belly, boost my booty, have more energy, dump my cravings, is what I’m eating doing that’ For me, I was eating clean for years. If you looked at my nutrition you’d be like, “Oh my gosh, you eat great.” And I was eating great, but for some reason I hit a plateau, I hit a wall and I couldn’t do more.

We all go on vacation and you want to take off those last few pounds before you go on vacation, and that was me, I just wanted to get a little tighter, and for some reason I’m like, “I can’t do it.” And I had someone look over my shoulder, I was like, “What am I doing wrong'” Because for yourself you can’t be the voice of reason because you’re like, “I’m awesome, I’m doing amazing.” Or you’re like, “I suck, I’m doing horrible.” You can’t have that middle ground like, “Well girl, this is what you need to do.” Most of us can’t do that with ourselves.

So, I had a third party look over my shoulder, and for the most part I was eating great, but I was eating too much for what I was doing, so I needed to tweak some of my choices. And that’s what I find with a lot of clients is that they need to tweak some of their choices, so maybe it’s not having two chia waffles, there’s nothing wrong with chia waffles, they’re great, but maybe instead of having two in a meal you bring it down to one and you add in some cottage cheese. It’s those kinds of yin and yang, that give and take of that.

If you noticed, I didn’t follow a plan, I had to step back and had to be flexible in my approach. So, it was like focus on making sure that my choices weren’t over the top. And when you break up with the right and the wrong and you see what foods feel right for you.

What’s Good For the Goose…

I believe I’ve talked about this before, but just in case – I’ve had a client who’s like, “I’m just starting to feel bloated and just horrible after I eat.” And I said, “That could be anything, so what I need for you to do is keep a log, and every time you feel bloated, I’d love for you to write down when. Every time you eat a meal, I just want you to just ask the question, “Do I feel bloated'” Over the course of a few weeks she was logging, and she found out that it was coconut oil. You read all over the interwebs, coconut oil is thebomb.com and three times on Sunday. But for her coconut oil wasn’t thebomb.com. For some reason there was something in coconut oil and her that no bueno.

So think about if I break up with the good food/bad food list and just focus on how I feel. For me, I can’t eat eggs. Scrambled egg whites, if I were to eat scrambled egg whites, I’m like, “So, what’s next'” 20 minutes later I’m like, “And what’s next'” It’s the ultimate protein, super healthy, there’s nothing wrong with egg whites; they just don’t do anything for me. Other people they’re like, “Oh my god, egg whites, I love them. I can make out with them.” But for me I’m like, “Yeah, I’m good, I’ll pass.” And I want to like them, but my body just metabolizes them too fast then my next meal needs to be like almost immediate.

Track Your Progress

If you aren’t tracking your food, start tracking. I know it’s a pain in the rump shaker, but the beauty of nowadays is that there are apps on your phone, hand write it, just keep it simple. And if you need a third party to look over your shoulder and see what’s going on, hit me up. You can always find me her and shoot me an email.

The reason why many of us follow a plan versus kind of taking the approach I talked about, seeing what our diet is and figuring out where the extras are, because most of us have extras that we can start to curtail back, we also can look and see if there are things that we should add in.

Most people probably aren’t eating as many vegetables as they should be, or aren’t eating as many good fats, or probably aren’t getting in as much protein as they should. But what happens is we all want certainty, we want to know that if I do what you say it’s going to work like a charm, it’s going to work as advertised, and unfortunately with nutrition we’re all bio individuals, what’s going to work for me isn’t going to work for the guy that just walked by on the street, that isn’t going to work for the woman who is walking next to me. We all have different needs and different tweaks that need to be made in order to satisfy our own individual metabolism.

So, the certainty I give you is that if you take the time to figure out how your body works, you’ll never diet a day in your life; I know that for certain. So, what you need to do is explore the alternatives to dieting, because certainty, as I’ve said before, comes from asking better questions, and the better questions aren’t the good food/bad food list, or “Can I have this'” list.

We are all grown ass women. And I want you to think about whatever program you’re looking at, can you afford it for a long period of time, not just for 30 days, not just for 10 days, can you afford it for a year’ Does this limit you’ Do you have negotiability in it’ I know for me I have one non-negotiable, actually two non-negotiables in my nutrition. My one non-negotiable is I will fist fight you over coffee. I’m just not going to give that up. I’m going to have coffee, and if my results slow because I’m having coffee, so be it. The second thing is I want to at least be able to once a week go out to dinner and not eat like a jerk, but go out and not be like, “Does it have this in it'”, not interrogate the chef and pretty much go in the kitchen and make my own meal, because been there, done that, and I don’t want that t-shirt anymore. Those are my two non-negotiables.

Unconventional Switch Up

When I first started this whole flexible dieting, I was like that’s what I’m going to build my nutrition around. And then I said those are my fun things that’s going to make my life sane. Then I said, “What is nutritionally going to help me long-term'” And one of the things nutritionally I put in there was that I wanted to make sure I got in all my vegetables, and so in order to get all my vegetables, every single day I have a giant salad right. And that salad always varies depending on the season. So, I change the salad green that I use.

I change up if it’s carrots or if it’s cabbage or it’s red cabbage. Sometimes I have broccoli slaw. I always make sure that there’s something new in the mix every single week to give myself that variety I need, but I’m also getting a ton of vegetables in there.

I want you to think about as you kind of try to wrap your head around this whole flexible dieting, what are the things that aren’t on everyone’s diet list’ So, maybe you need to have two squares of chocolate every day. Maybe once a week you need to have a mocha from your favorite coffee shop. I don’t know what it is, but we all need to have those one or two things that keep us sane.

Then, we need to have that balance, that moderation. We need to have that one or two things that you know are healthy and sustainable. My salad – I can have a salad anywhere on this planet, maybe Antarctica might be a stretch, but most places on this planet I can go in and order a salad with some type of protein on it and be happy as a clam. So, I want you to think about that. 

And also, as you’re looking at nutrition, are you somebody that’s going to meal prep’ Or do you have to meal prep, or can you pull together pieces to create that meal prep program’ And does it require a certain amount of workouts’ There is this new workout, I can’t remember the name of it, and someone was asking about it where it requires you to work out two times a day for 45 minutes each round, so for 90 minutes. Well, back in the day I used to work out two hours, that was my bare minimum, and if I didn’t work out two hours, why work out’ But now I’m like, “45 minutes two times a day, oh kill me.” That’s just not in my wheelhouse. I can give you 45 minutes, no problem, but 45 minutes two times a day, oh heck no, that ain’t happening.

So, I need you to be honest with yourself, and I’m not talking like 30 days. Who can’t do anything for 30 days’ I’m saying give me a year. Look at it on a long horizon and look for a year, and if you’re ready for an alternative to diet, ready to really look at this flexibility, I’ve created a report, The Four Alternatives to Dieting, you can find that on my website it’s . 

The post Flexible Dieting: How To Quickly And Easily Create One appeared first on Kim Barnes Jefferson.

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A New Approach to Weight Loss

We all have our own approaches to what the new year is going to bring us. So, what I wanted to talk about is what if we turn dieting on its head’ You’ve seen all the commercials just as much as I have, you’ve heard all the commercials, and it’s all about “give up”, “drop this”, “do that.” What if we stop focusing first on dramatically dropping our calories and dramatically upping our workouts’

For some people dropping calories and upping workouts, keeps people in that perpetual cycle of chasing skinny. You give up all the “bad” food you rely on willpower and then your willpower gives up, your motivation runs away and you find yourself on the couch with a pint of Ben and Jerry’s Dublin Mudslide with a side of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Once you get out of your sugar coma you promise yourself that you will get back on to the “wagon” again. You’re going to go to the gym every day and hit up every class that so-and-so told you, will give you a tight butt. “The class that will give you six-pack abs.”  You are going hard, but you can’t sustain it because that’s not who you are, it’s too hard and you go back into that cycle. I’ve been in the fitness industry for over 15 years and I see it time and time again.  

The first Monday in January everyone comes in, ready to rock! I’ll tell you that by March 31st 20% of the those with fitness goals stick. The other  80%, I’m going to see them again NEXT January.

I don’t want that to be you.

No cold turkey

What if we took the two things that everyone says they need to start with – diet and exercise – and we put them on the back burner and “Instead of chasing skinny I want to chase lasting results.” And I know for many people lasting results come from having great habits, because if you’re not in the habit of working out, if you’re not in the habit of eating right that’s like trying to force someone who is a smoker to stop smoking cold turkey. Why would they have the patch and these other things if quitting smoking was just like, “Hey, I’m not going to smoke anymore” and they’re done’ That’s what you’re trying to do when it comes to diet and exercise.  You’re like, “I was having Big Macs and margaritas yesterday, and now I’m not going to salads and water.” 

Reboot your mind

What I want to say is if you’re tired of that reboot button, what if we started to focus on your mindset first’ Now, it isn’t sexy, not by any stroke of the imagination. But what I know is that when I

✅ clear out the cobwebs up in my head,

✅ clear out all of the negative self-talk,

✅ clear out all of the judgments that I have on myself,

✅ clear out all of the comparisons,

that’s when I’m going to start making some serious changes because I can’t outrun my mind.

But I know I can outrun the next person on the treadmill 😉, I can probably out-diet somebody, but I can’t outrun the coo-coo that lives in my head. And we all have that coo-coo that lives in our head it only seems to comes out when you’re trying to do something different. It’s that voice that say you shouldn’t even try. You suck, you’ve been done this road before and failed why try!

I always challenge my clients, and I tell them if I focus on my mindset the body is going to follow.

What happens is when you start with diet and exercise and you’re like, “This is great! This is awesome! I’m doing amazing!” But there is always going to be a roadblock, there is going to be a challenge that comes up and your mind is going to tell you, “You know girl, how many times are you going to go down this road’ How many times are you going to try’ How many times are you going to fail’ How many times are you going to make this perfect when it’s not perfect’ How many times are you going to be let down and disappointed'” That inner voice starts talking louder and louder. And even though you feel great you’re making progress, your mind can find a way to knock you down just like that.

The challenge: Start where you are

I want you to get away from the focus of how fast things are coming, because that’s one of the first things that always knocks people off track.

When it comes to starting down the path of mindset, please know that mindset isn’t one of these things like, “Oh, in 30 days I’m going to have a brand-new mindset.” that’s not how it works. Working with my clients I use the Arthur Ashe quote as my framework “Start where you are.”

Arthur Ashe Questions

I want you to sit down and just say, where am I’ When you start down the diet road, what are the obstacles that jump out at you first’ What are the excuses that you say about yourself’ How far down the path do you get before you get squirrely’ And by ‘squirrly’ I mean are you four weeks in before you start questioning, “Is this working’ Am I getting results'” When do you start to press the freak out button and start feeling like, “I’m not getting the results from my efforts”‘ At what point have you experienced that in the past’

These are the obstacles I want you to focus on.  “Here are my known obstacles, here are my known excuses” so that when they pop up you can start to build the toolkit to bust through all of the lies, all that malarkey and just be able to say, “You know what, it’s my mind trying to stop me from taking things to the next level. It’s my mind trying to keep me safe.” 

As humans we like certainty. We want to know that when I close my eyes at night the sun is going to rise. You want to know that there are 24 hours in a day.  As you go through each step of getting healthy and fit you want to know. “How am I going to react on each step'” This is where the work comes. And that’s why most people don’t want to do it; IT’S WORK. It’s not this “take this pill wake up in three days and you’re going to be down 40 pounds.”

Do the work

Trust me, my life would be so much easier if I said, “Take two of these and call me on Friday.” I wish, but that’s just not how it’s going to be. Here is where that inner work comes, and that’s where most of us slip up. It’s our society, we want to snap our fingers versus have to ride through the uncomfortable parts, the feeling of the unknown. But if you’re able to do that, trust me, on the other side is going to be the results that you want. It’s going to be what you want. It is going to be that blue sky. But you’ve got to go through the dark forest first in order to get to that blue sky.

Define your sustainable success

I want you to think about how you define success, I want you to break free of your past self. I don’t want you to be like, “Back in high school I weighed 138 pounds” and you’re now 40. It might happen, but let’s just break up with old high school you. Instead let’s say, “In the last five years I’ve weighed this.” Or, heck, throw the scale out and just say, “In the last five years I’ve been a size blah, and I want to go back to being that size.” Then, I want you to take it to the next level – in order to be that size, what are you willing to do long-term’

If you want to get down to a size 10, size 8, what am I willing to do’ Am I willing to do it for the next five years in order to get there’ Because a lot of times people get to that size and then they’re like, “I can do whatever I want now.” And then gradually they creep back up. I want you to think about whatever you chose it has to be sustainable, and that sustainability starts in your mind.

We are always going to be working on our mindset. As you knock down one barrier, another barrier is going to pop itself up. It’s just a constant building of that toolbox in order to get that bulletproof mindset that instead of wallowing for a couple of days you might wallow for a couple of hours or what used to take you out for days isn’t even a blimp on the radar anymore. I don’t want you to think that all of a sudden, you’re this bullet proof Wonder Woman, deflecting all of your obstacles and challenges. 

You’ve got to move

The second piece is MOVEMENT. Now, I’m not talking balls to the wall kind of workouts. I’m just talking moving your body. And if we think about it, in our society we don’t move as much as we used to move. 20 years ago – which was a short period of time – we walked a lot more. There weren’t remote controls, you cranked your window by hand – it was a luxury, an option that sometimes you decide you didn’t want to pay for to have power windows, so you cranked your windows.

And when you hear people say these little things like – “get more movement in your day, take the stairs. If you work in a corporate environment go to the bathroom the furthest from your desk.” All those little things add up, those are active daily living. Why do you think the Fitbits and the activity trackers are so popular’ It’s not because the Fitbit https://amzn.to/2AJxRqh is pretty; it’s because we don’t move.

I do a lot of work in corporate environments. I go in and teach group fitness classes in companies, and a lot of the companies over the last few years have adopted more standing desks because fidgeting, that’s movement, or pacing, that’s movement. While you are the standing desk, you’ll do more fidgeting than you would sitting in a chair.   Fidgeting burns 29% and 38% more calories than just sitting in a chair. Those little acts of daily living add up.

If you have a dog, you’re definitely going to be out at least two times a day with the dog. If it’s a puppy you’re out way more if you’re trying to potty train it. Little things that add up and you will get a lot of bang for your buck. 

Are you getting 10,000 steps’ And if you aren’t, what can you do to get those 10,000 steps’ I’m at 12,000 steps today, and some days I can hit 30,000 steps and some days I can hit 5,000 steps. It’s very telling about what kind of day I had with those two types of steps.

Enjoyment and satisfaction

After you get mindset and movement down THEN we can focus on food, and I know you want me or any fitness professional to hand you over a magic fat-burning, calorie-torching food list. Here’s the thing – when you work with me, I’m not that type of coach that says, “Okay Susie, here is the ‘don’t eat this’ list and here is your meal plan for this week, and here are the foods you can have.” I don’t do that because this is what I know – you are a grown ass woman and you know what to eat. You know that super sizing it out at McDonald’s isn’t exactly the best thing for you. You all know that. It’s just a matter of helping you to figure out what’s the best thing for you.

I call 3 Meal Planning — satiation, satisfaction, satiety

The first thing I always say to people is we have to focus on the type of meal that you’re eating. And so, what that means is, do you have satiation with that meal’ A big word to say do you feel full’ Do you feel like you’ve had enough’ Do you feel like you don’t need anymore’

Was your meal satisfying’ Did you enjoy it’ Enjoyment piece is not a physical thing,  my brain will tell me if what I just ate was satisfying.  My stomach can be stuffed, but my brain can say, “You know what, there are some cupcakes over there and I want one of those. I’m having one of those. It’s going down.” 

Eyes vs. Belly

And trust me, you’ve all been there. Think about it – you’re out to dinner and you’re like, “I’m so full, it was a great meal.” And then the waiter comes by, and restaurants knows that you eat with your eyes, they have a dessert tray that physically shows you a sample of dessert is versus handing you a piece of paper. Restaurants are smart.  I worked at a restaurant and we used to hand out a piece of paper. Then, we used to have one piece of the desserts on the cart, as soon as we started doing that I sold way more desserts than before. We get satisfied with our eyes even though our belly is like, “Oh girl, I can’t have no more”.

What I want you to focus on, as you’re putting together meals, I want your meals to feel satisfying and I want them to physically look satisfying. Why do you think restaurants spend so much time on the presentation of the meal’ Because if it looks pleasing to my eyes it’s going to feel pleasing to my belly. So, I want you to think about, “I want something that gives me that quick hit of fullness, then I want that fullness to last and not just a few moments.  I want that fullness to last a couple hours so that I don’t feel like I’m always eating or always seeking food.

Maximize your nutrition

After that then I’m going to focus on caloric intake because I want to have maximum food from minimum calories, if that makes sense, I focusing on food QUALITY and not just  “This has X number of calories.” Then I’m going to say, “Does it satisfy me'” Because I know when you focus on X number of calories or X number of macros and you eat it and it’s not as satisfying, it doesn’t leave you full, guess what’ You’re off looking for the next thing, and that sucks.

Beware of trigger foods. They are foods that trigger you to eat keep eating it’s food that you just can’t get enough of, it just hits all the taste buds in the right spot and lights up your brain like Christmas day. Pay attention those foods and do your best to not have them in your house.

When you’re building your menu focus on the foods that you’re going to eat. I want you to sit down and really think about what foods you find satisfying but are also filling. It’s like broccoli – minimum calories, but if you can eat more than a cup of broccoli…(I’m going to look at you funny because clearly there is something is wrong with you.)

Their is so much fiber in broccoli that most people can’t eat more than a cup of broccoli in a sitting. You might be able to eat several cups over the course of the day, but in NOT one sitting“. It’s satisfying, minimum calories, and with all that fiber in it, it’s going to stick with you for a while. So, I want to think about things in terms of that.

Create a meal daisy chain

As you go through your day those are the types of meals you want. But I also want you to think about meals being daisy-chained together. The first meal of the day can affect the rest of your day. Let me just backup and explain what that means. My first meal, if it doesn’t hit on all those buttons, (satiation, satisfaction, satiety)

If you don’t feel full, satisfied or if your hunger comes quickly back.  That’s going to set you down this avalanche of seeking and nibbling.

I know for me, it’s eggs – sometimes if I’m traveling and I’m not in my normal environment sometimes the only choice I have is eggs. And eggs for me, they are not very satiating. I can eat three to four eggs and probably within an hour or two I’m like, “What’s next'” I’ve done it all, I’ve put in vegetables, I put toast, I do all the things to make that meal way more filling and way more satisfying, and it doesn’t do it for me. So, when I have eggs first thing in the morning it sets me down the snowball of, I can’t eat enough of other foods. And so, you might have foods like that, or now I’ve raised your awareness may start thinking about, “Do I have foods that do that for me'”

That first meal of the day doesn’t have to be breakfast. I know that some people are into the intermittent fasting and all that other stuff, that’s fine. But whatever that first meal of the new day is, I want you to make sure it hits on all three Ss

• Does it make you feel full’
• Does it stick with you’
• Is it satisfying to the brain’

Let’s make sure we are not maxing out on our calories. If you think about it, it’s like Denny’s or Applebees, they’re all over the internet like, “If you eat this breakfast, you’ve eaten breakfast for five people.” I don’t want those kinds of breakfast if you feel me. 😉

Plan your success

That’s where the meals come in. It flips meal planning on its head a little bit so that your focus more is making sure you are full versus, “I need this many calories or this many macros of carbs and this many macros of protein.” It’s focusing on making sure by the end of that meal you are not hungry, you are not craving, and your energy isn’t in the toilet. Makes sense’

Work it out

The last piece is the workout. So many people want to solve the eating problem with the workout. It makes me crazy when I hear people say, “Last night was a bad night. I’m just going to sweat it out on the Stair Master. Or I’m going to not eat today” 🤦🏽‍♀️It makes me crazy when I hear that. You can’t outrun a bad diet. If you ate it, you own it, the end. You ate. You own it. Move on. I hope you enjoyed it, next.

Working out is not about, “I need to kill myself. I need to work so hard that I feel like my heart is going to pop out of chest. I need to work so hard that the next day getting off the toilet is hard for me.” No. I want you to focus on quality. I want you to say, “If I could get in three to four awesome workouts I’m winning.” Now, when I say awesome, it’s awesome for that day, because some days you feel like you could lift a Buick, other days scanning your card at the front desk is all that you can do. Each day you work out check in with your body and go with how your body feels on that given day.

And that’s how we’re going to flip dieting upside down. That’s how you’re going to break free of chasing skinny. That’s how you’re going to say, “I can live a happy life with an occasional cocktail and have cream in my coffee.” 🥰 It starts with having good habits, creating these small little habitual wins that are going to help you create routines. Having a great routine gives you the courage to keep going so that eventually you’re able to get this consistency.  And it’s the consistency that’s going to get you the results. It’s not these hit or miss endeavors that you do here and there and every once and a while it’s like, “What can I do on a day-in and day-out basis for the next five years for the rest of my life'”

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