Am I the A**hole… To My Own Body?

(How Maintenance Helped Me Finally See Results After 40)

If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything right — eating clean, working out, tracking your food, yet your body still gives you the middle finger, you’re not alone.

That was me.

I was frustrated, stuck, and honestly? Mad. Mad that my body wasn’t bending to my will.

But one day, scrolling through my favorite Reddit thread — “Am I the A**hole?” — it hit me:
Welp, I was the ahole.**
Not to anyone else… but to my own body.

The Hard Truth: My Body Wasn’t Broken — It Was Burned Out

For years, I’d been trapped in the same cycle, always dieting, always pushing, never letting my body breathe.

I told myself I was being “disciplined.” But what I was really doing?
Trying to control a body that was begging for a break.

Here’s what I’ve learned coaching women over 40:
Most of us know how to diet.
What we don’t know is how to maintain.

And maintenance?
That’s where the magic actually happens.

The Maintenance Phase: The Secret Weapon No One Talks About

About 18 months ago, I decided to do something radical stop dieting.
No cuts. No bulking. No extremes.

Just maintenance.

My coach and I focused on stabilizing my food, workouts, and mindset. The goal wasn’t to lose; it was to hold steady and rebuild trust with my body.

Sounds simple, right?
It wasn’t.

Because after years of “go hard or go home,” maintenance felt foreign. It forced me to slow down, tune in, and get curious instead of critical.

I realized I’d been living off shakes and bars — nearly 40% of my protein came from supplements. My calories hovered around 1,100–1,400 a day. I was under-eating, overtraining, and wondering why nothing worked.

So we made small, strategic tweaks:

Swapped some shakes for knife-and-fork protein
Ate before workouts
Added veggies and fiber to meals
Focused on consistency, not perfection

And slowly, things started to shift.

What Happened When I Stopped Hustling

My energy came back.
My sleep improved.
My mood stabilized.
My body composition changed fat went down, muscle stayed strong.

Was it fast? Nope.
Was it sustainable? 100%.

For the first time, I wasn’t chasing smaller — I was chasing better.
And I finally understood:
Maintenance isn’t the boring middle it’s the foundation for long-term fat loss and hormonal balance.

Why This Matters for Women Over 40

Once you hit your 40s and beyond, your body plays by different rules.
Hormones shift. Recovery matters more. Stress hits harder.

You can’t bully your metabolism into submission anymore.
You have to partner with it.

That’s why maintenance is so powerful it gives your body the space to recalibrate, rebuild, and respond again.

If you’re constantly dieting, your body’s in defense mode.
But when you maintain, you tell your body, “Hey, we’re safe.”
And only then does it let go of what it’s been holding onto.

The Flip Flop Life: My Maintenance Mindset

That “Am I the A**hole?” moment was the spark for The Flip Flop Life my program for women who are done with extremes and ready to find their rhythm.

It’s built on one truth:
You don’t need to try harder.
You need to try different.

We focus on ease over hustle, curiosity over control, and sustainability over struggle.

Because the real magic?
It happens when you stop fighting your body and start listening to it.

Your Next Step

If this hit home, I recorded a full episode about it on the Fit Girl Magic Podcast “Am I the A**hole to My Body?”

In it, I walk through:

The biggest mistakes women make in maintenance
How to rebuild trust with your metabolism
Why eating more can lead to better results
And the small shifts that changed everything for me

Listen in and ask yourself:
Where might you be pushing too hard — and what would happen if you got curious instead?

And if you’re ready to stop being the a**hole to your body, The Flip Flop Life is officially open.
This is where we rebuild your health with ease, balance, and confidence no more Monday restarts, no more burnout.

Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic

Free Resources: https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/freeresources_podcast

Website: http://www.kimbarnesjefferson.com

Flip Flop Life