How to Stop Being Scared of Money with Tess Waresmith

I’ve said this before… and I’ll keep saying it: the biggest stressor for most women over 40? Money.

And yet… no one teaches us how to handle it. We grow up thinking bills magically get paid, lights turn on when you flip a switch, and somehow, everything will “just work out.”

But then life happens. Divorce. Job changes. Kids. Unexpected expenses. And suddenly, it’s crystal clear:

If we don’t take charge of our money… no one else will.

That’s why I brought Tess Waresmith onto the Fit Girl Magic Podcast to have a REAL conversation about finances, with no jargon, no judgment, and zero stiff suits. Just two women talking about what we all need to know.

A Story That Hits Home: The Chili’s Moment

Tess shared a powerful story about her mom:

When Tess was little, her mom, recently divorced and raising two toddlers, used a dating service. But not just for love… she was looking for a financially stable man because she didn’t feel secure on her own.

That stuck with Tess. And when her stepdad passed years later, her mom had no idea what accounts they had or how much money was in them. The stress was overwhelming.

Tess realized right then: I need to handle my own money. I can’t rely on anyone else to do this for me.

Why “I’m Too Late” Is the Biggest Lie

One of the saddest limiting beliefs Tess sees?

Women thinking they’re too late to take control of their financial life.

Here’s the truth: 40s is NOT too late.

In fact, many of the women Tess works with make huge financial strides in just a few years.

But every year you wait… it does get harder. You have less time for your money to grow and compound. So today is always the best day to start.

And here’s the thing: everyone has financial regrets. That purchase you knew you shouldn’t have made. That investment that didn’t pan out. We’ve ALL got a story.

But that shame is what keeps you stuck. It’s time to let it go and take the next step.

The “4% Rule” And Why You Don’t Need Millions

Here’s a simple way to think about retirement:

If you retire with $1 million, you can withdraw about 4% a year — around $40,000 — without running out of money.

And no, this doesn’t include Social Security, which can help supplement your income.

Does $1 million sound impossible? It’s not. Especially when you start investing consistently and understand how powerful compound growth can be.

And if you don’t have that much yet? That’s okay. The key is knowing your financial independence number — how much you need to feel secure — and building toward it.

Bougie Broke: The Sneaky Trap

Another gem from Tess? The idea of being “bougie broke.”

You know what that looks like: fancy car, designer bag, kitchen gadgets galore… but under the surface? Debt.

Social media makes this worse — it’s so easy to compare yourself to someone else’s highlight reel.

But what matters isn’t what you show — it’s what you keep. Your future self will thank you for every smart money move you make today.

Bottom Line: You Are Not “Bad With Money”

Here’s what I hope every woman over 40 hears:

You are not bad with money.

Money is a skill. You can learn it, at ANY age.

The hardest part? Taking that first honest look at where your money is going and choosing to do things differently.

If you’re ready to shift out of shame, build confidence, and finally feel EMPOWERED with your money — go listen to my full conversation with @wealthwithtess on the latest Fit Girl Magic Podcast.

And if this blog post hit home, comment below or DM me — I’d love to hear what resonated with you!

Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitgirlmagic

Free Resources: https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/freeresources_podcast

Website:  http://www.kimbarnesjefferson.com

FREE Quiz – Is Your Metabolism Tired AF? https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/metabolism-makeover
FREE Guilt Free Alcohol Guide https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/alcohol_evergreen_2025podcast/

Tess Waresmith https://www.wealthwithtess.com/
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/wealthwithtess/

FREE beginner investing resources https://www.moneyconfidentclub.com/

Books mentioned

I’ll teach you to be rich https://amzn.to/4k0wSEY
The Millionaire Next Door https://amzn.to/4ecxE0g
The Psychology of Money https://amzn.to/4kSNu2F

Links: Facebook group Free Resources: https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/freeresources_podcast
Website:  http://www.kimbarnesjefferson.com 
FREE Quiz – Is Your Metabolism Tired AF? https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/metabolism-makeover
FREE Guilt Free Alcohol Guide https://www.fitgirlmagic.com/alcohol_evergreen_2025podcast/
Tess Smith https://www.wealthwithtess.com/
Instagram @wealthwithtess
FREE beginner investing resources https://www.moneyconfidentclub.com/